Sunday, November 11, 2007

Newbie

I saw her from across the parking lot. She was cute, young and obviously excited. As I got closer I heard her tell the two toddlers she unbuckled from car seats in her little car that was adorned with fuzzy dice and pink seat covers that she was so excited that mommy let Aunt Jo bring them to Wal mart with her. I would guess Aunt Jo to be 17. She was so good with these kids that I almost felt guilty letting her walk into wal mart with kids that looked to be 3 and 4 without a warning. She put them in a buggy and I heard her explaining to them that Aunt Jo had a few things to get and if they were good she would let them look at toys. Ha...Newbie....she had no idea. I went on my way to get a few things and instantly felt guilt. Guilt that I wasn't explaining to her the pitfalls of wal mart in November. The toy section is bad enough but when there are flashing lights and trees all around.......the most experienced parent has trouble. I went to the shampoo aisle and saw her go to the section of hair car products. Shampoo is one thing but hair care products usually take some time and label reading. I saw her looking at a few things and reading but about that time child#1 turned around and noticed the entire section of flashing singing reindeer and snowmen. I'm not sure what words came out of that child's mouth but it sounded like AUNTJOIWANNASEETHESMOWMANSINGAUNTJOIWANNAGOTHEREAUNTJOAREYOULI
ISTENINGAUNTJOAUNTJO.
I was finished in the shampoo aisle so I went back to the camera/film area. It took about 5 minutes and Jo, now not quite as happy looking, came back toward the toy section. She was still patient and I heard her explain to the kids that they were going to look at CD's first and then toys. I chuckled to myself and went on to find my niece some pet shop thing that I wanted to get her for Christmas. Aunt Jo must read quickly because she was in the toy section in about 2 minutes, without any cd's in her buggy. I also noticed there weren't any hair care products in there now. Aunt Jo explained to her niece and nephew that they were going to look through toys quickly and go home. The kids agreed and they started through the toys. I found the pet shop toys and as I was looking for the one I needed I wasn't surpised to hear the crying start, then the screaming started. Aunt Jo was trying to make them put toys back she had let them hold.....Aunt Jo is such a rookie. I was finally finished with my walmart trip and as I walked past Aunt Jo I silently wished her luck as I went to pay for my purchases.
I loaded my bags in the car and noticed poor Aunt Jo trying to squeeze two screaming toddlers into the backseat of her little two door car. Both kids had their arms out and legs splayed to keep from having to get in their seats. Aunt Jo had no bags. I still wonder what Aunt Jo did to her big sister to make her want to punish he like that...or was it her own little form of birth control for her little sister.

3 comments:

kim-d said...

Oh, that is so funny! I'll bet Auntie Jo's older sister is STILL snickering. I personally think anyone who takes a kid into Wal-Mart needs their head examined. I personally think anyone who takes themselves into Wal-Mart needs their head examined. I am so happy to have my new SuperTarget so I never again have to go inside those gates of hell labeled "Wal-Mart." Well, except to get my eyes examined. HATE THAT PLACE WITH A PASSION!

Kellan said...

Boy ... she'll know better the next time, won't she? Poor Newbie! Funny post! See ya.

Anonymous said...

Making a mental note, in case senility sets in: "Do not ever take the grandchildren to Wal-Mart."